Zordon for a Day
by James Austin Valiant
Summary: Zedd makes a fool's wish that Quagmire is only happy to grant


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Disclaimer: I don't own the Power Rangers, or Zedd, or anyone else in this fic. Buena Vista does. I'd like to thank Adri and her marvelous fic, If It Hadn't Been For You. It inspired this version of Quagmire granting someone else's wish. Joe Rovang, for the extensiveness of the Writer's Guide. And I'd like to thank all of you, who will hopefully read this. 

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Zordon for a Day  
by James Austin Valiant 

The evil warlord was not comfortable in the RV. He tossed and turn in the small bed he shared with Rita. Both of their staffs were leaned next to each other on the nearby wall, and he glanced at them. Still not in a comfortable position, he rolled over again, taking most of the sheet with him. 

"Look, radiator-face, if you're not going to go to sleep, go outside and get some fresh air. I need my beauty sleep!" Rita's nasal voice reprimanded the dark wizard for his actions. 

"Fine, fine!" Lord Lucien Zedd grabbed his staff from the near wall and walked out of their room, down the small hall of the RV. He passed Rito and Goldar's room, Finster's room and hopefully, someday, the nursery. He came into the small kitchenette and wandered outside, onto the moon. 

He glanced over to the Machine Empire's massive base. There were mechanical walkers scouring the moon's surfaces for precious metals; he was hoping in vain they would not find Serpentera. _Sepentera, fully charged, could spell doom for the Earth! And I want that power in my hands, not theirs!_

He signed, leaned up against a rock formation. His red visor gleamed, and he zoomed on the Earth. The moon and Earth operated on different times, so it was day there and night on the moon. Well, night, if you could call it that. It was always dark on the moon, no matter what. The deep void of space apparent to them all. 

His telescopic vision came upon the Zeo Rangers. As they battle Mondo's latest creation, he had to suppress the urge to cackle. Didn't Mondo know by now he wasn't going to be able to beat the Rangers? Rita had tried forever and failed, then Zedd had tried and almost succeeded a few times. _Even Master Vile couldn't do it! What makes Mondo thinks he's so different from the rest of us?_

The Super Zeo Zord had called upon the Super Zeo Megazord Sabers, and Zedd could almost hear the Red Ranger shouting "Super Zeo Megazord Saber, power up!" The two swords combined into one yellow blade, and sliced through the latest Machine Empire failure. The monster turned, fell down and exploded. _Same old, same old sighed _Zedd, as he blasted a nearby moon rock with his Z staff. 

He heard a scream from the Machine Empire castle, and this time he cackled openly. He then suddenly fell silent. _Why does it always happen like this? Why can't it ever be different?_

Zedd barely noticed his thoughts were becoming words. "This *always* happens. The Rangers never fail to defeat us. Why can't it be twisted around? Why couldn't it be different? Why couldn't Zordon and I have been in different roles?" He paused, then huffed, "I wish." 

A poof of multi-colored mist erupted near Zedd, and he turned to hear a screeching flute tune that made his ears want to vomit. That it is, if he had ears and they could vomit. "Who's there?" he called, swinging his staff wildly at the darkness. 

"I wouldn't have come, I had a gig, but I'm sure I heard you wish, you dig?" A small impish creature spoke to Zedd in rhyming phrases. 

"What the blast? Who the deuce are you?" Zedd questioned. 

The dwarf listened to Zedd's question, and played another tune on his flute. "I have the answer you seek, sire and my name is...." He paused. "I've got a test; why don't you guess? My name is a combination of a slang term for an Eltarian priss and a heap that you'd might step in this." 

Zedd thought hard. "Well, the first one's a quag...I'm not sure about the second one. Quagcrap?" 

"Sorry dope, the answer's nope." 

__

Hmm.... "Quagpoop?" 

He shook his head. 

Zedd's eyes lit up. "I know you now! Rita's magical imp from the Island of Illusion. Quagmire, what exactly is it you want here?" He stopped, before adding, "And drop the rhyming phrases. That's really, really annoying." 

"All right, I'll stop rhyming." Quagmire conceded. "But the fact of the matter is, Zeddy, you made a wish. I'm here to grant it." 

The Emperor of Evil glared quizzically. "What wish?"

"You wanted a role reversal. You in Zordon's place and Zordon in your place." 

Zedd shook his head. "Are you for real? 

"As real as the blood and toxins that flow through your tubes, Zedd my boy!" He grinned, played a tune on his fife, and the warlord and the imp vanished from the moon in a cloud of gray and red smoke. 

***

"Where are we, Quagmire?" Zedd inquired, surveying the rocky terrain around them. 

The imp pointed towards a massive building with a singular tube in the middle of it and entrances on either side. "Don't recognize it, Zedd? It's the Command Center, but history's a bit different now." 

"How so?" 

Quagmire walked towards the structure. "Well, instead of you and your Darken Forces being on the side of evil, you and the Light Forces were on the side of good. And Zordon and the Order of Meledon were on the side of evil. You, Rita and the others fought Zordon to Earth, and imprisoned him here, in the Command Center, along with his dutiful servant, Alpha Five. 

"Zordon still managed to trap Rita in the dumpster, but he also trapped you as well. He's stuck in the Command Center still, but in humanoid form, just unable to exit the parameters of the Center. Your dumpster's been opened, just as Zordon has figured out a way to extend his magic among the citizens of nearby Angel Grove." Quagmire slowed his speech to a halt. "Let's have a look inside, shall we?" 

The two entered the Command Center. Inside, Zordon stood at the head, near his Eltarian throne. His hair was a deep brown, his eyes were a strange golden color. His attire was a dark gray and very un-Zordon like. The wizard looked up, and evil gleamed in his eye. 

"Alpha," He called, his voice sharp with the enjoyment of being bad, "are the preparations ready?" 

The android look the same, but even his voice had a sinister callous on it. "Yes, Your Evilness. The necessary steps have been taken to insure that Earth will be yours." 

"Yes!" Zordon grinned. "After 3000 years, I'm free! It's time to conquer Earth!" 

Zedd looked around the Command Center. It was technology-rich, like the other one, but in a different way. In an evil way. Grays and blacks covered the place like shadows, and a thin fog covered the ground. At the very end of the Center was Zordon's viewing globe, which he knew was a valuable asset. In short, this was Zedd's type of hangout. 

The warlord turned to Quagmire. "At last, I'll get to see Zordon taken out, time and time again, by my unbeatable Power Rangers!" 

"Or so you'd think...Zordon still has the coins. He just isn't going to use them the way he would've intended too. Instead, he'll concentrate them into his armies." answered Quagmire. 

"What?" He slammed his staff into the ground, then aimed it and fired an energy beam at the evil Zordon. It passed right through him. "What the deuce...Quagmire! What's going on?" 

Quagmire rolled his eyes. "Zeddy, you're *not* this reality's Zedd. You have no power here. Therefore, you're seemingly a ghost. You can't attack anyone here, and no one can hear you, either." 

Zedd glared. "Well, let's get to the moon then. I want to see how my situation is." 

"One second. First, it's off to the Angel Grove Youth Center." Quagmire uttered, and before Zedd could respond, they vanished in a cloud of smoke. 

***

The smoke cleared, and Zedd saw that he was in the Youth Center, in the entrance. His evil gaze scanned the place. He saw kids playing on video game machines, teens laughing and talking, fighters sparring on the gym mats in the corner. The juice bar owner was dispensing drinks in usual fashion, to any and all thirty individuals. _Although this tub of lard is hardly the man to run a juice bar....it looks like he lives on a diet of flaxseed oil and peanut paste!_

Out of the corner of his visor, he saw them. They occupied a table in the center. They were talking, laughing and generally having a good time. 

__

Now's my chance! He thought, aiming his staff. Then it came to his mind. He couldn't kill them, he wasn't part of this reality. 

The pink-clad Kimberly, the blue-wearing Billy, the black attired Zack, yellow clothed Trini and Jason in his red...all sitting there and there was nothing he could do! 

"Damn it!" He cried, striking his fist on a table, as he glowed an light red. "I have the opportunity and I can't even do anything!" 

The earth began to quake, and the five teens were teleported out in streams of light. Quagmire shook his head, trying to keep his composure, as was Lord Zedd. 

"It's Zordon's first attack against Earth," He explained to Zedd, "and your calling of the five teens to the moon for a briefings. Let's go, shall we?" 

***

Kimberly looked around as their molecules reaffirmed their rightful positions. "Where are we, guys?" 

Zedd shielded his eyes. "Damn it, Quagmire. It's light and bright in here; it's cheery, it's decent, it's good! I can't stand it!" 

Quagmire shrugged. "I don't make the rules, I just follow 'em." He pointed to an approaching figure. "And that would be you." 

"Welcome, people of Earth! I am Lord Lucien Zedd, and your planet has urgent need of you." A human stepped out before them, clad in a white robe with matching white tunic and pants. In his hands, he clutched a silver Z staff, almost identical to the evil Zedd's own. 

Quagmire giggled. "Your first name is Lucien?" 

Zedd nodded. 

"OK...Lucy." 

Zedd glowed. "Shut up and listen, won't you? Why do I look like that?" 

"Heed your own advice," Quagmire advised, "shut up and listen." 

Jason stepped forward, confronting Zedd. "What are you talking about, man? What do you want with us?" 

Zack nodded. "Yeah, how can we help the Earth? We're just kids!" 

The good Zedd smiled. "I'll answer one at a time. Eons ago, a great war was fought between the evil being known as Zordon and his Order of Meledon and me and my Light Forces. The fighting went on for so long, we eventually agreed to a truce. A coin toss. 

"Zordon couldn't be trusted. He made six magical coins and won every single toss. But myself and the beings of good in the universe could not let Zordon hold the universe in his grip of terror! We double crossed him, trapped him on Earth in his Command Center, alongside his robot companion, Alpha Five. He trapped myself and the Forces in a dumpster, per prior agreement. But we had him. Or so we thought. 

"Shortly before we were able to escape from the dumpster, Zordon figured out how to make his magic extend beyond the barrier of the Command Center. That earthquake was the first in his wave of attacks. I asked my servant Finster to acquire to us five warriors that would be the best in defeating Zordon. And that's were you come in." 

The other Zedd rolled his eyes. "Get a bucket, Quagmire, I think I'm going to vomit." 

Benevolent Zedd nodded to the stairs. "These are my Light Forces. The Empress of Good, Rita Righteousa," the beautiful black haired-woman curtsied," my main warriors, Goldar," a golden-armored man appeared, with wings strapped to his back, "and Scorpina," a white-haired woman, clad in metallic armor and wielding a stinger blade, came forth, "and my chief aide, Finster." Finster was in mortal form, white tufts of hair sticking up every which way, the points of ears still sticking above them. 

Billy walked up to Finster. "Wow...a real life elf? That's something you just don't see everyday." 

Finster chuckled. "Not on Earth, no." 

The evil Zedd tapped his foot impatiently. 

Quagmire hushed him. "Shuddup, Lucy. We're getting to the good part." 

Rita stepped forward, in her tan clock and wielding her old familiar staff. "We've decided," She began, in a voice too beautiful for her counterpart, "that Earth needs protectors. Five wielders of the magic of good to combat Zordon's evil forces. Step forward and receive it." 

Seeing little other choice, the five teens stepped forward, and Rita lay her staff on each teen's shoulder, giving them their power. 

"Kimberly, bubbly and youthful. You will do the Pink Power well." 

She came to Billy. "William, smart and resourceful. The Blue Power is yours. " 

Zack was next. "Zachary, energetic and full of life. You will command the Black Power." 

Now it was Trini's turn. "Trini, deep with understanding. Yours is the Yellow Power."

And finally, Jason. "Jason, full of spirit and ready for the fight. You have the Red Power and are the leader of the Power Wielder team." 

Goldar stepped forward. "Now, there be times when Zordon calls upon his massive machines of destruction known as Zords. When this happens raise your arms to the sky. We will be watching. Scorpina and myself will come down, and Zedd and Rita will aim their staffs at us, allowing us to grow as tall as the Zords to combat them." 

Zedd nodded, and Goldar stepped aside. "To transfigure," started Zedd, "draw your staffs from their pocket dimensions, raise them to sky, and call upon your respective color power. You will be transformed with armor of that color and your Power Staff. Use them to combat Zordon. 

"Now that you have become Power Wielders, you must follow three basic rules or lose the protection of the power. First, never use your power for personal gain. Second, never escalate a battle unless Zordon forces you. And finally, keep your identities secret; no one may know you are a Power Wielder." 

Jason nodded, denoting his rank as the leader of the team. "All right, guys, let lay waste to this Zordon and his Command Center! IT'S TRANSFIG' TIME!" 

Quagmire nudged the evil Zedd. "So, what do you think of your nicer self?" 

Zedd eyed him up and down. "I think he sucks. And this whole things sucks. I want out." 

The imp raised an eyebrow. "And not see how it all ends?" 

The warlord pondered. "All right, let's see how it goes." 

***

Zedd and Quagmire stood on an open field, as Zordon's army of evil Ranger foot soldiers and a monster and "his" Power Wielders ran toward each other. Zedd smiled under his faceplate; finally, he would get to see Zordon's forces trampled by "his" own. 

__

Wait a second...what the hell is this? The Rangers were defeating the Wielders, and the monster was slaughtering them with lefts and rights. "What's the meaning of this? I'm losing!" 

"Duh!" Quagmire stated, as though it were a well-known fact. "No matter what reality we're in, Zeddy, you're pretty much always on the losing side." 

"This can't be!" The Dinozords appeared, and the Rangers and monster leapt into them. "Zedd, Rita! Help us!" From space, Zedd observed Goldar and Scorpina arriving, and a bolt of energy striking them all, causing them to grow to massive heights. 

"Ha ha!" Zedd screeched, as he watched the Wielders, Goldar and Scorpina take down the Megazord. "We're winning! We're winning!" As the Wielders charged their staff weapon, the energy from the tip of it hit the Megazord, and it disassembled, scrambling the Zords back into their hiding places. 

Zedd jumped and down, barely able to contain his excitement. "He'd" beaten Zordon. "I've beaten Zordon! This is the greatest day in the history of the world!" 

"You've beaten him once. Don't forget, he's in your spot now. He'll be back again, just like you always came back. And there's the saga of the White Ranger..." 

"You mean Green Ranger." Zedd corrected. 

Quagmire shook his head. "No, the White Ranger. When Zordon figured out that he wasn't going to be able to defeat you with the Dinozords, he upgraded to the Thunderzords. When that wasn't enough...well, why won't we just take a look and find out...." 

***

Tommy Blanque starred down the Power Wielders. They knew who he was now, that he, Tommy, was the evil White Ranger. Zordon had instructed him not to listen to their pleas, not show them any mercy. He would destroy them all, no matter the cost to his own health! 

"Tommy, stop! Don't do it! You're good inside!" Jason begged him. 

Kimberly chimed in. "Yeah, Tommy. This is not you, at all. Zordon's got you under a spell." 

"Don't try to trick me, Wielders. Zordon warned me of that. Now you all shall perish!" He pulled out Saba and ran towards them, as they began to battle. 

Zedd turned to Quagmire. "So, Zordon created the White Ranger to combat my Power Wielders?" 

"'fraid so." Quagmire pointed. "Speaking of being afraid, look at the that." 

Jason was on the ground, and Tommy had Saba at his throat. "Any last words, Red Power Wielder?" 

"First of all, you can kill me, but you'll never stop us. And second of all..."He took off his helmet and spit on the White Ranger, "screw you." 

With that, the White Ranger drove his sword deep into Jason's throat, watching the Pink Wielder cry out in horror. Jason's eyes went blank, rolled to the back of his head, and he fell dead, there on the ground. 

Kimberly ran to his side. "Jason! No!" She held his head in her lap. 

If Zedd were able to furrow an eyebrow, he would've. "What's this? I thought it was Tommy and Kim, not Jason and Kim." 

"Since Tommy is evil, and will always be evil, there's no hope for Kimberly to ever be with him. Sure, she is attracted to him, but she can't go any further than that. Now, she only hates the man who's killed her boyfriend." 

"Kimberly, look out!" Trini dove in front of her friend as the White Ranger swung his sword, and had her head unceremoniously decapitated from her shoulders. She had given her life for Kimberly's. 

"Let's get out of here!" cried Billy, ready to teleport out. 

"He killed Trini and Jason! He's not going to do that without hearing from me!" Zack ran towards Tommy, but he too, was struck down. Saba went through his chest like a knife through warm butter. The White Ranger laughed. "Three down, two to go." 

"Let's get out of here," Billy repeated, yanking Kim from Jason's side and teleporting them both out. 

Zedd's visor was misted a bit, due to the heat of the battle. "So that's how the Power transfer occurred this time around. And Tommy *was able* to slaughter the Red, Yellow and Black Rangers. Quagmire, show me what else happens." 

Quagmire nodded, his own eyes teary, and teleported them both out of there, as the White Rangers tied his three dead opponents together and dragged them out there. 

***

They re-appeared on a rock overlooking a large plain, and Zedd poked Quagmire with his staff. "What's this?" 

"We're going in fast forward mode now. You were never able to defeat Zordon, not with the White Ranger now on his side. You recruited new Power Wielders, and even added a Green Ranger to your side. But he was no match. Zordon drained his power away, just as you drained Tommy's in your reality. 

"Zordon kept finding new sources of energy, such as the Zeo Crystal. You called in favors from Master Virtuous, the Machine Empire, Divatox, Astronema and Light Spectre, but to no avail. You all fell to Zordon. And then he managed to kidnap you, just as you had your team of Astro Wielders in a ship wandering the cosmos, looking for you. Let's go to the final scene." 

***

Zordon laughed evilly as he observed Zedd behind his cage in the Command Center. "I've done it, Zedd, I've done it! I've finally won! And after I drain your power, the universe will finally be mine!" 

The good Zedd spat. "The universe will never be yours, Zordon. My Wielders will see to that." 

As soon as Zedd spoke, Andros ran into the room, gripping his Spiral Saber. 

Quagmire tapped the evil Zedd on the arm. "This is what is to come in your reality. Pay it no bother, since you can't relate this to your existence yet." 

Zedd nodded knowingly. 

Andros observed his mentor trapped in the cage. "Zedd! I'm getting you out there!" 

Zordon glared. "Oh, no you don't, Astro Wielder!" The White Ranger stepped out from the shadows. 

"Good to see you again, Andros," said Tommy, "I hope you'll remember this. Well, you won't I will." He paused. "Because you'll be dead." 

"That's what you think!" said Andros. He ran toward the evil White Ranger, and they began to clash. Zordon nodded in amusement; this wouldn't take long. Besides, he had other, more pressing matter to attend to. He left the Command Center in a stream of black smoke. 

The evil Zedd coughed. "Damn, that's choking." 

Tommy and Andros continued to battle back and forth. The battle grew intense, and wear began to show in both Saba and the Spiral Saber. Both of their helmets became knocked off in the course of battle, and Tommy was able to stare deep into the eyes of his opponent. 

"I've killed Red Wielders before, and I can do it again!" Andros wasn't concerned with Tommy's threat. He noticed the locket around Tommy's neck. He drew up the one from around his own; they matched identically. 

"My god, it can't be! You're not...you must be." 

Tommy stopped his assault. "Well, spit it out, Wielder." 

"How long have you had that locket?" 

Tommy's gaze turned cold. "Since forever." 

Andros stepped forward. "Titus?" 

Quagmire felt there was a need for an explanation here. "As I'm sure you yourself are aware of Zedd, the Red Astro Ranger in your reality's sister was carried off by Darkonda and sold to Dark Specter. In this reality, the Red Astro Wielder's brother was carried off by the Blue Sentarion and sold to Zordon on Earth. He was raised in a normal American family, until Zordon decided it was time to train him." 

Zedd nodded, acknowledging the change in storylines. 

Tommy shot back a questioned glare. "What did you call me?" 

"Tommy, listen to me." Andros pleaded. "These lockets were given to only two people; one to myself and one to my brother, Titus. We lived on KO-35. Then, tragedy struck. When we were both four years old, the Blue Sentarion came and carried Titus off from our backyard. I was able to destroy the Sentarion, but I could never find Titus." He paused. "Tommy, I think you are him." 

The control that Zordon had over Tommy has broken. "Oh my God...I am Titus. I remember now. The Blue Sentarion carried me off. I cried for mother, father and you for days. I was re-adjusted here on Earth, ready to serve Zordon. My god...Andros...brother." 

He ran toward Andros, gripping the other man in a tight hug. 

"Shhh," said Andros, trying comfort his brother, "it's ok, Titus. I'm here now." 

"We have to stop Zordon!" cried Titus angrily. "But how?" 

"Kill me." came the reply from the cage. 

Zedd almost choked. "Excuse me?" 

Even though he couldn't hear him, the other Zedd answered Zedd's question. "If you destroy me, Titus, Andros, you will release a wave of magical energy that will be enough to wipe out all of Zordon's evil. Do it." 

Andros looked at his brother; Titus glanced back at him. They aimed their respective weapons and at Zedd and charged into him. Zedd's eyes went blank, and a great silver energy burst from his quickly eroding body. Andros and Titus fell back and down, avoiding the energy wave. 

Quagmire conjured up a cloud of smoke, and he and Zedd disappeared again. 

***

"Well?" asked Zedd, as they reappeared. "What happened then? Was 'my' wave enough to destroy the evil in the universe?" 

Quagmire shook his head. "Not exactly. Your wave destroyed the Command Center and all the evil within 100 yards of it. However, it wasn't enough to destroy Zordon. Look below." 

Zedd obeyed. He saw Zordon with six Rangers. "After you were dead, nothing stood in Zordon's path. He finally got the idea of joining the coins to five individuals, and now Andros and Titus fight side by side along with Ashley, TJ, Carlos, Cassie and Zhane. Zhane has the Green Powers that Zordon got a hold of from you. 

"Look there. They're killing Rita, Virtuous, Goldar, Scorpina, Astronema, Light Spectre....all of your allies are being destroyed by Zordon's forces. He conquered the earth, then the universe, Zedd, and was crowned Grand Monarch of Evil. He succeeded where you and the Machine Empire have failed so many times. He managed to destroy the forces of good, and take the universe for himself." Quagmire finished. 

Zedd observed a crown made of hardened magma rock, with a large gold and red jewel on it, being placed on Zordon's head. It was his coronation as Grand Monarch of Evil he was observing. A red cape was slung over his shoulders, and he was handed a silver scepter. 

"I am Grand Monarch Zordon, Ruler of All the Universe!" He announced to his crowd of minions below him. "And things will never be the same again!" He cried, pounding his scepter on the arm of his throne. 

Zedd growled angrily in disbelief as the massive crowd around him yelled "Hail, Zordon! Love live Zordon!" 

"This is insane! This is stupid! I should be at that spot! That should be my throne!" He ran to Zordon's side. "You hear me, you old buffoon? This is my throne, my title, my scepter, my crown, MY VICTORY!" 

Zordon didn't seemed to notice or care. He just sat with an evil smirk on his face, surveying his subjects. 

Zedd turned to Quagmire. "I wish you'd get me out of here. This is so disheartening, it's not even funny." 

"Was never meant to be amusing, Zeddy. And frankly, I've had enough of it, too. Let's skid-daddle." 

***

They arrived back on the surface of the moon, and Zedd was glad to be back. He checked the Power Chamber on Earth; Zordon was inside, in his tube, good as ever. He checked the inside of the RV. Rita, Goldar, and Finster snored away, bad as they could ever hope to be. The Machine Empire still occupied their usual spot, and the Rangers, as he observed, were still concerned with the welfare and well-being of the citizens of Earth. 

"Oh thank the Heavens! It's all over! I'm back in my own reality! Thank you, Quagmir....Quagmire?" He glanced around, but the imp was no where to be seen. Instead, he heard a voice, indistinct, speaking in rhyme. 

"It's no problem Zedd, it's not out of my way, make a wish like that again and I'll grant it any day." 

Zedd mumbled, destroying another moon rock with his staff. A smoking goblet appeared in his hand, and he toasted Zordon from the moon. 

"Ah, Zordon. I never realized how tough your job truly is. Good luck to you, old friend. Good luck!" With that, he took a sip from the goblet and headed back inside the RV for a good night's rest. 


End file.
